Arsenal Banter Archive October 30 2014

30 Oct 2014 20:48:58
I was once refereeing a match.

Halfway through the 1st half, I saw a funeral procession going past.

I blew my whistle, stopped play, and bowed my head in respect.

About a minute passed, than one of the players said to me, "wow, what an honourable thing you just did ref, respect".

I said, "well, we were married for 20 years, its the least I could do".

:-) 7.5 that Dags deserved an 8 but you spoilt us with the pet insurance gag and are struggling to reach those dizzy heights again

30 Oct 2014 21:46:56
Lol G62,

You loved my pet insurance joke :-)

Top joke 2014 Dags on here or anywhere else mate, that's a 9.2 of anyone's money

{Ed025's Note - not of mine..

30 Oct 2014 22:10:17
Ed, I thought being a Toffee you would like a good joke :-)

{Ed025's Note - i do mate....do you know any?.. :)

Must be a me thing Ed but just really got to my sense humour, Kevin Bridges show about how in Glasgow you get an empty as a posed to having a party cracks me up every time I see it :-)

30 Oct 2014 22:24:27
Lol Ed :-)

G62, I can't stand Kevin Bridges, I can't understand him for one.

I'm more of a Lee Evans man :-)

{Ed025's Note - i like lee evans myself dags..

Kevin Bridges Rhod Gilbert and Stuart Francis are all hilarious for me lads, Lee Evans is funny too but not in their league imo

{Ed007's Note - Kevin Bridges is just a modern Billy Connolly, there are loads of people in Scotland as funny as them, back in the 60s and 70's there was a Billy Connolly in every pub, shipyard and factory in Glasgow. They're not THAT funny if you're Scottish. Rhod Gilbert is quality though, try and watch some Jim Jeffries, he's an Australian comedian and is hilarious. Comedy Central show his Alcoholocaust tour sometimes and his newest stand up is on Netflix.}

That jokes a classic dags

30 Oct 2014 23:26:53
Ed,

Lee Evans is hilarious. Saw him at O2 in London last year, never laughed so much.

{Ed001's Note - he is just a Norman Wisdom clone, with a serious sweat problem that makes me feel sick. Not my thing at all, I prefer comedians to be clever and funny and not need someone else to write their gags for them.}

Kevin bridges is terrible. Not funny at all. Lee evans all the way.

31 Oct 2014 07:48:31
Bond, Jim Jefferies has to be my favourite stand up. I fully recommend everyone check him out! Well not if u get offended easily lol.

{Ed007's Note - I was never into 'comedians' like Roy Chubby Brown, anyone can be crude and revolting and that's all he was. Jim Jeffries is funny, he does use a lot of adult language but that's not all his show is.}

Ed007, Jim Jeffries is awesome!

Another really funny Australian comedian is Carl Barron , and I also like Donald Glover, went to his live show in New York 2012, youtube it.

{Ed007's Note - I'll check them out, cheers.}

Tim Vine for me. can't wait for his new tour. seeing him at the Bloomsbury next year (and Stuart Francis just after. another brilliant one -liner comedian)

31 Oct 2014 14:48:00
Epping,

Tim Vine and Stuart Francis are brilliant.

I'm amazed how they remember all them one liners.

Louis C.K. Is by far my favorite comedian, all of you probably know him. He won't have any one liners for you dags but, not everyone can have the same sophisticated sense of humor can they now?

{Ed007's Note - A few American lads I know rave about him but I watched a few episodes of his sit-com/stand up TV show and wasn't keen.}

31 Oct 2014 16:25:58
Hoover,

My kids rave about him, reckon he's very funny :-)

I prefer his stand up, his show is pretty much dark/cringe comedy. He definitely has a very different style and I've definitely met people who don't find him that great. I would like to know some more British comedians, I just think a lot of the big names in American comedy just aren't that funny. I'm only 22 and only recently started enjoying standup, some names would be great.

On another note looking forward to the game tomorrow, I won't be content with 3 points if it isn't a stylish victory. We need confidence, and we have no excuse not to impose our attacking style upon a struggling but key side.

{Ed025's Note - there is too much football talk on here for my liking hoover, try and tone it down a bit mate.. :)

31 Oct 2014 23:20:58
Lol Ed, like it.

30 Oct 2014 19:43:13
DAGS

A lot of ref's bring it on themselves

Anyone see City v Newcastle last night, how did Newcastle not get a penalty and City reduced to 10 men

It was blatant

Poor from the ref

NO

Very poor

As Le Tiss said " he bottled it "

And yes I have been in the middle with a whistle

30 Oct 2014 21:49:48
I agree Bambam, but I think on the whole they do a decent job, apart from the ones who are trying to be the star of the show.

31 Oct 2014 11:44:32
Refs are people, most are decent, a couple are excellent, and a couple are so bad the make everyone think a black or yellow jersey automatically makes a person a deaf idiot. I ran a pub lesgue for many years and I soon learned which ones to hire for the season who could understand our league and level and be sensible to let the game go on, yet protect people so they could work next Monday. I had to wrok hard with the teams to protect the refs from abuse, so they would come back for us the next year.

I think the new crop of refs coming into the league are better trained, but until there are more of them, I have to go w Bambury, there are a few real duffs who want nothing to do with making a decision; that's bad for the game and that's when players get hurt.

Valid Dags some refs want to be the star man

30 Oct 2014 17:38:50
Re today's poll about refereeing standards and G62's post.

Personally, I have a lot of sympathy for ref's.
They have a very difficult job to do, every decision they make/don't make, is scrutinised by every possible camera angle and every pundit/player/ex-player/manager/supporter under the sun.

I think a referee should be allowed to ref, but they have to follow strict guidelines that have been put in place by Eufa/Fifa/ FA, or whoever is in charge.

They are constantly assessed in match by the above powers and are not allowed to interpret the game how they want to, for fear of being pushed down the referee's list, or indeed banned from refereeing a Prem match for the following weekend.

Yes, some are over zealous and some are complete pr###s, ie, the one who booked Chambers for coming on the pitch 2 seconds too early in recent CL game but, on the whole, do a pretty good job.

I've played at pub team level where no ref was appointed so someone from the home team would ref it and those games were awful to play in, I also ran a kids team for a few years and when a parent reffed the match it was infuriating watching kids try to beat 11 other kids and an adult who had no intention of letting his sons side get beat.
Every game is better for having someone honest in the middle, as long as there honest mistakes I can accept them all, we all have good days where we score a hatrick and clear two off our own line and we all make match losing mistakes that cost our teams glory that's the beauty of the game, we don't mean to have the really bad games and neither do refs but they happen to us all at times

30 Oct 2014 19:25:14
Absolutely G62,

I have referee'd on numerous occasions and its very difficult, but enjoyable at the same time, as long as you are doing your best.

I'm surprised a few ex players are not ref's, but I guess its an issue of a major drop in wages.

Dags I've done it once and was absolutely awful, forgot to look at the blokes running the line, was ball watching and when in doubt gave it the oppositios way, which was so often some of my own team didn't speak to me in the pub after the game.Every player should have to ref a game of some kind to get some appreciation of what it takes

{Ed025's Note - its a very hard job G62, i used to ref in a junior soccer league in liverpool, and to be honest the parents on the line were a nightmare, the kids were fine, but the pressure from overbearing mums and dads made it really hard, some were even telling their kids to kick their opponents, and a shout of break his legs was even heard in some games!..i spent more time arguing with parents than reffing half the time which was very disheartening, so i do have sympathy for most of them, but sometimes the odd ones think they are the star of the show..

Agree with G62. I played Saturday football for many years with proper trained refs, but for one season I got roped into playing Sunday morning footie. one week the other team supplied the ref. we were a poor team, bottom of the league, but somehow were winning the game 1-0. we were clinging on, and one of our players asked the ref how long to go, and he genuinely replied, until we win. we lost 2-1. . in an approx 55 min second half. .

Kids football brings out a terrible side in adults Ed the parents become animals but the ones I totally loathed were the manager who wore track suits with their initials on them, what's that about :-).
I used to turn up at 8.30 on a Sunday morning after a long Saturday night to put nets up often often in the clothes I was wearing the night before.
Win lose or draw if the kids gave their best it was worth it.
Back in the day I had long hair and had a bet with the kids in August that if they got to the simi final of the East Anglian cup ( bigger than it sounds) they could shave my head, their all 27 now and we share a pint and talk about the day they got the clippers out.

{Ed025's Note - good stuff G62, thanks for shearing it with us.. :)

30 Oct 2014 08:50:54
Theo will be back to the starting 11 soon. How would you guys place the attacking front three with Theo back?

30 Oct 2014 09:06:21
With Ozil out:

Ox - Welbeck - Theo
#10 Alexis

With Ozil back:

Alexis - Welbeck - Theo
#10 Ozil

Alexis - welbeck - theo
Chambo

30 Oct 2014 11:54:51
Sanchez + Welbeck + Walcott
Ozil in the hole.

Pace and quality with Ozil the puppet master.

30 Oct 2014 18:05:17
While Ozil and Giroud are out.

Welbeck
Alexis - Wilshere - Theo

After they return in Jan swap out Welbz and Wilshere

Ox Jack
Aaron
Theo Danny Alex.
Its better than just keep pretending wth Arteta and Flamini, would jack and Ox cope? I don't know the answer for sure but Arteta and Flamini? that's been answered many many times.
In the absence of the real deal let's be brave and adventurous rather than predictable and hope its ok

30 Oct 2014 07:41:00
On todays poll on Refs I don't think their standard has dropped I just think their job has got much more difficult.
Back in the day tackling was seen as a skill and part of the game not a crime, pulling shirts would have been seen as a a very strange thing to do, diving to con the ref would have been booed by home fans as they wanted to see football not amateur dramatics and offside was well off side.
Only two games were televised each week so lots of mistakes were never seen by the masses let alone over analysis by the hundreds of pundits who make a living out of trying to find fault with everything they did.
Personally I think the refs are ok its the rest of footballs standards that have found their way into the gutter, when all players pass completion rate is 100% and all pundits predictions are 100% spot on then we should expect perfection from our refs but until then just accept they do a very good just not perfect job

{Ed001's Note - pulling shirts was normal, the Italians made it into an art form and George Graham's back four were amongst the world's best at it. Keown was even known as 'The Rash' due to his wrestling and shirt pulling in the box.}

30 Oct 2014 11:53:48
I don't think refs have got worse, I think their performance management has got worse. How many times have we seen a poor ref struggle to implement a new direction on to a game whose flow just doesn't fit FIFA or FA interpretations. There are too many refs who know the rules but not the game because of this. But I think a couple of the new young refs coming up are pretty decent.

But G62 is right, refs are people and they aren't going to hit 100%. Consistency is an art form, not applying the letter of the law.

ED01. I used to know a girl who was nicknamed 'The rash'. I don't think it had anything to do with football though!!

{Ed001's Note - was it Dags?}

30 Oct 2014 17:10:58
Lol, thanks Ed :-)

I find it weird that managers get fined if they make a comment about the ref post match, but the ref never has to explain them selves. I would like it if refs appologised when they made mistakes. And if a manager brings up a valid grievance with a poor decision that cost their team poins its discussed rather than punished

29 Oct 2014 22:26:08
Just seen Wellington silva has been granted a visa and can play for us next season. Dubbed the new neymar. Can anyone shed any insight on how good this lad can or can be?

The new neymar lol there nearly the same age. he's not great from what iv seen. Will end up low la liga team I guess on perm deal

I saw him on the week of his trial when my lad and I were invited to London Colney. He ripped a Norwich U18 side apart. Scored 4 and made another 3 as I recall. Looked awesome then but has had issues of a behavioural nature wherever he has been on loan I understand. However, many lads can be like that and then suddenly mature. Let's hope so eh?

I think we will sell him like vela. Gnarby is streets ahead of wellington silva and a lot younger.